12/06/09

Have you ever read TRIPMASTER MONKEY? I have the same problem that Kingston has, which is that I've read too much, seen waaaaaaaay too many films. It gets you to where you can't stop quoting and citing. It's better to exist in moderation, believe me.

Observe: one afternoon I was walking with a friend who was walking her chihuahua. Such an archetype of fragility was this animal. We chatted, friendly but not exactly close, the time passing chatter of obligatory acquaintance. As we came around a corner so too, coming the other way, toward us, did another dog walker, a fierce woman with a pit bull. Her face was like a metal spike. After a volley of profound barking and an equally profound death sonata of hair raising squeals I saw the little dog's hind legs sticking out of the pit bull's mouth. There was crunching.

I relate this inciden to you because it appears to contain a moral about suffering. Or maybe it doesn't - you decide.

In other news: if I'm forty eight, and I've masturbated three times a day since I was fifteen, that's 36,135 times. That's arithmetic. Can you get your mind around the numbers?

In other developments: in the novel THE ORIGIN OF THE BRUNISTS by Robert Coover a man has the thought "They all want it." If you had to guess, what would say that refers to? In the song HAIR OF THE DOG by Nazareth a lyric goes "Black hearted mama, love that charmer." What's "charmer" a euphemism for? Your ability to detect patterns is amazing. Congratulate yourself.

Should we start with Goya now? Eh? I have so many perspectives available that it seems like a can of worms to even start - Malraux, Robert Hughes, Evan S. Connell - oy. How many men in history, do you think, have had a Duchess of Alba thing going on in their lives? I know, but what would your guess be?

Which brings us to the investigation of pejorative phrases like "bleeding heart liberal."